[chatter] SCRBL split

[LightGuide]

Hey, LightGuide, sounds like you and ables need to discuss his ideas about using mutant sea bass (http://www.aota.net/forums/showthread.php?postid=126019#post126019) with laser beams (http://www.aota.net/forums/showthread.php?postid=126038#post126038). Shiny! :yeah:David Ables and I share an ample technical background in advanced sensor technologies... and we're currently secretly (even he doesn't know about this) working together on a methodology of detecting and entrapping spammers as they migrate through the general population.

We differ, however, in disposition. Whilst David favors the mutant sea bass solution, I tend strongly toward skinning spammers alive and mounting their ugly heads on pikes outside FutureQuest Headquarters.

[Chipmunk]

BM-LOL!!!

You're taking the best of Predator and Babylon 5, and blending them into a superb dish... best served cold. :)

Did you see my post about my spotting a [b]wood chipping truck? I was about to pass it (on a rural backroad), when I realized what it was, then got into a nice tight formation with it, and feasted my eyes upon its beauty and thought of you & Terra. :)

Sadly, no pics, but now that I know it exists, I'll keep my eyes peeled.

[DogAndPony]

... and we're currently secretly (even he doesn't know about this) working together on a methodology of detecting and entrapping spammers as they migrate through the general population.Hmmm... Perhaps using sniffers to pick up the scent of a certain pink potted meat product, combined with a severe lack of deoderant? :qthurl:

...Bob

Bob West

[ables]

David Ables and I share an ample technical background in advanced sensor technologies...
Yeah, but how many tax dollars has the government given you to develop an anal probe?

So now that you've blown my cover, what are these "advanced sensor technologies" of which you speak?

-dave, rather confused, but that's probably because Deb took out all the juicy posts :wink:

[Chipmunk]

David, as far as I know, nobody's posts were removed. I think it was just a firm warning from Deb who's clearly legitimately stressed by all this. Given :( what she's been dealing with (http://www.aota.net/forums/showthread.php?postid=126001#post126001), I think the Service Desk could make productive use of some of the devices you mention above. :)

Would the aforementioned ... um ... "probe" ... be for the purpose of ... um ... inducing a certain reaction for the purpose of obtaining a certain ... um ... substance ... that um ... we probably shouldn't be talking about here?

Out here in the Heartland Geek World, we have a saying:
You might be an Aggie if AI does not first bring "artificial intelligence" to mind. :)

Deb, thanks for the chickadees pic! I was briefly dismayed by the presence of a you-know-what with my favorite tiny bird, then remembered how amazingly agile & fast thinking these Geeky little birds are. Coincidentally, four of them turned up at my feeders the very next morning (my first of the year), and have been entertaining/distrating me since then (including some, um, "displays" related to creating more chickadees). :)

[ables]

Would the aforementioned ... um ... "probe" ... be for the purpose of ... um ... inducing a certain reaction for the purpose of obtaining a certain ... um ... substance ... that um ... we probably shouldn't be talking about here?
Heh. No, nothing so "fun." One of our spinoff companies (http://www.sierrainst.com) (hosted on FQ, of course :yeah: ) builds a catheter that maps out swallowing pressure, which we market to GI docs.

Turns out, there's also a market in mapping out squeeze pressures at the... um... other end. So we wrote an NIH grant to build such a device. And not just any device. This is the highest-definition anal probe ever seen where the sun don't shine, as it were. :shocked:

But now we're really off-topic, so I think I'll go to bed. :sleep:

[DogAndPony]

And not just any device. This is the highest-definition anal probe ever seen where the sun don't shine, as it were.Saaaayyyyy... Are you that guy who accepted an offer to throw himself into a volcano (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099892/)?

...Bob

Bob West

[TVB]

Would the aforementioned ... um ... "probe" ... be for the purpose of ... um ... inducing a certain reaction for the purpose of obtaining a certain ... um ... substance ... that um ... we probably shouldn't be talking about here?

You mean?
santorum (http://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial_s&hl=en&q=santorum&btnG=Google+Search)

Folks...you know what I get paid to talk about...that was too easy. :rasberry:

[Randall]

Jeez. I turn my back for a few hours and you guys manage to get yourselves fork-split. (Mmmm, English muffins...) Yeah, but how many tax dollars has the government given you to develop an anal probe? That is so wrong.

Randall

[LightGuide]

Yeah, but how many tax dollars has the government given you to develop an anal probe?

So now that you've blown my cover, what are these "advanced sensor technologies" of which you speak?
Around these parts, broomsticks serve many purposes... and we only mark them up very slightly (to cover the, uh, paperwork, you know) when we sell them to the government.

[ables]

Ack! We've been forked! (Sorry, Deb. :blush: )

Saaaayyyyy... Are you that guy who accepted an offer to throw himself into a volcano?
Well, I was, until that @#$! Joe took my gig. I swear, a contract ain't worth nothin' these days.

You mean?
*snip*
Here I am talking about reputable medical devices, and you people just go straight to the gutter.

Cool. :kewl:

-dave, My work here is done

[DogAndPony]

Mmmm, English muffins......with frickin' forks on their heads!

...Bob

Bob West

[DogAndPony]

Ack! We've been forked! (Sorry, Deb. :blush: )Uh... Yeah... Sorry, Deb! :BPG2: Well, I was, until that @#$! Joe took my gig. I swear, a contract ain't worth nothin' these days.Yeah... having to spend the rest of your life with Meg Ryan... Nice work, if you can get it! :wink:

...Bob

Bob West

[Randall]

Here I am talking about reputable medical devices, and you people just go straight to the gutter. This from someone who keeps mutant fish? ("But at least they don't have forks on their heads!")

LightGuide, on the other hand, would have no compunctions about implanting puncturing devices in sea bass. Or broomsticks.

Randall

# "These parts"?

[LightGuide]

I have one just for you, Randall, if you're interested. It's even been de-splintered.

[Randall]

See? No compunctions at all.

Randall

[ables]

This from someone who keeps mutant fish?
What can I say? The sharks were too expensive. And I still had to pay quite a premium for the ill-tempered sea bass. Mellow sea bass can be had on the cheap, but they're hardly menacing. :rollpin:

[LightGuide]

One wonders what one does to a sea bass, given David's vocation, to make it so ill-tempered...

[Randall]

One wonders what one does to a sea bass, given David's vocation, to make it so ill-tempered... Some of us are trying hard not to, thankyouverymuch.

"...any sea bass above 5lbs. is considered a large fish."

Randall

[cindik]

This from someone who keeps mutant fish?

You would rather he gave them away?

[ables]

One wonders what one does to a sea bass, given David's vocation, to make it so ill-tempered...
It's easy. Just take away their daytime TV and watch chaos unfold. Hell hath no fury like a sea bass denied its Oprah.

You would rather he gave them away?
Hmmmm... Anyone wanna help me setup an online shopping cart? www.illtemperedseabass.com :rasberry:

-dave

[Randall]

You would rather he gave them away? Millions, nay, billions of people will never experience mutant sea bass ownership. He could bring joy to a young child's face.

Just don't let the brat get too close. :QTpacman:

Randall

[LightGuide]

Hmmm... I surely hope this isn't one of those cases where we may need to involve the PETA (http://www.peta.org/) people.

I would personally be deeply offended if the humble and loving sea bass were being subjected to, uh, ummm... anal scientific investigations.

But, I ask you -- what can one think? A good-natured denizen of the deep, suddenly turned vicious and dangerous?

The conclusions, my friends, are inescapable, given the occupation of this sea bass imprisoner. I admit, I have not personally inspected the personal parts (sea bass are very shy, you know) of this fish, but...

[Randall]

Hell hath no fury like a sea bass denied its Oprah. Wait a minute. Sea bass? Opera? Are we talking about some kind of highbrow Big Mouth Billy Bass (http://electronics.howstuffworks.com/singing-fish.htm)?

That would be a very mutant mutant. :shocked:

Randall

[ables]

Hmmm... I surely hope this isn't one of those cases where we may need to involve the PETA people.
You mean "People Eating Tasty Animals"? They're always causing a ruckus.

The conclusions, my friends, are inescapable, given the occupation of this sea bass imprisoner.
Surely you jest. I am but a humble engineer, dedicated to saving the world through the magic of tactile sensing. :ytangel:

[ables]

Are we talking about some kind of highbrow Big Mouth Billy Bass?
No, but with a few chips, some soldering, and too much free time we could be (http://www.mit.edu/~vona/bass/bass.html)... :boat:

[Randall]

No, but with a few chips, some soldering, and too much free time we could be (http://www.mit.edu/~vona/bass/bass.html)... :boat: So now we've progressed to cybernetic ill-tempered mutant sea bass. That say "Pork."

Mmmm, pork...

Randall

[cindik]

So now we've progressed to cybernetic ill-tempered mutant sea bass. That say "Pork."

Mmmm, pork...

Randall

Better than saying "spam"

[Randall]

Don't give him ideas. He's clearly a mad scientist out to rule the world with armies (navies?) of mutant fish.

Randall

[ables]

Better than saying "spam"
Wait, wasn't that where we came in originally?

Hey Deb, we're topical again! Can we go back to the grown-ups' table? :dopey:

[DogAndPony]

Mmmm, pork...It's the other whitefish!

...Bob

Bob West

[LightGuide]

Surely you jest. I am but a humble engineer, dedicated to saving the world through the magic of tactile sensing.You young whippersnappers with all your newfangled technology -- ya think ya gotta use it for everything.

Well, by golly, when I was a youngster, we just slipped on a rubber glove, extended the middle finger, and made a gentle remark to the patient about bending over...

[Randall]

Hey Deb, we're topical again! Topical, or tapioca?

I hate tapioca. made a gentle remark to the patient Goats always appreciate that.

Randall

[Deb]

You guys kill me.....

:confuz: =)

[cindik]

It's the other whitefish!

...Bob

Bob West

Pork Loaf....


...the Other White Bread!

[ables]

You young whippersnappers with all your newfangled technology
Who're you callin' a whippersnapper? Why in my day, we didn't have these fancy computers with their Internets. We sent our TCP packets via pack mule!

-david, "And we liked it!"

[ables]

made a gentle remark to the patient
Goats always appreciate that.
Woah, now! Let's not bring the Scots into this!

[LightGuide]

Why do you think they wear those kilts.

[ables]

Why do you think they wear those kilts.
I wear mine to show off my sexy legs, but I can't speak for everyone.

[Randall]

Woah, now! Let's not bring the Scots into this! Too late. Kilts (http://www.aota.net/forums/showthread.php?t=17632) (and LightGuide's goats) have been topics of discussion before.

Randall

[Chipmunk]

_

[Andilinks]

If I post here now will Chipmunk delete all his posts?

Andi

[VicCa.]

Yes. People with honor keep their word (http://aota.net/forums/showthread.php?postid=125135#post125135).

Ms.Links, why don't you stop harassing vets and other adults, then grow up?

If you had a shred of decency, you'd put in a help desk request to have your troll moved somewhere else, before you drive another person out of these forums. Blech!

I've just added you to my ignore list. Will you pout, spatter and fume?

[Andilinks]

stop harassing vets and other adults...Just what have I done that so annoys vets(?) that they think they are being harrassed? I think I am the one being harrassed here, leave cryptic messages and ignore me... Well yes you are ignoring me, so I guess I can't expect an answer.

Andi

[ables]

Um, what just happened? :umm:

[LightGuide]

Um, what just happened? :umm:I have no idea, David; but I'm putting on my rubber glove, just in case.

[Randall]

Randall, am I having an Alzheimer's Moment, or did your title change? I'm sure I'd have remembered "cute"! Did I miss some thread/post(s) related to this? Yes, it was minor hijacking incident in this thread (http://www.aota.net/forums/showthread.php?postid=125880#post125880). :o

Randall

[DogAndPony]

Wise you are, in the way of Geek Food.Mmmm... Geek food! I love gyros. All meaty and garlicy!

Hmmm... I have a theory...

Yes! After Googling (in a very... uh... special way) I found this:

---
Thousands of years ago, there was a food vendor in ancient Greece who was known for his tasty gyros meat, wrapped in pita bread.

One day, there was an earthquake, and his business was reduced to rubble.

He decided to rebuild, and came up with an idea to attract customers. He put the spit for his gyros meat up at the front of his shop, and paid a boy to crank the spit around and around. The boy was very young and energetic, and had a habit of cranking the spit very fast. While the shop owner didn't like it at first, he realized it was attracting attention, so he encouraged the boy to spin the spit as fast as he could. People came from miles around to watch the boy spinning the spit of roasting meat, and to enjoy the delicious food.

After several years of excellent business, there was another severe earthquake. The ground shook, and all of the shops around the food vendor's began to sway and crumble.

But his shop stayed relatively still!

Then the boy became frightened, and got up from his spit cranks to run home. As soon as he stopped cranking, the shop began to tremble.

"Quick!," said the shop keeper, "Crank the gyros again! It is helping the shop cope with the earthquake!"

The boy did, and as the meat-laden spit began to spin faster and faster, the shop began to stabilize! Every shop in the area was leveled... but not the gyros shop!

And to this day, that shopkeeper is known as the father of the "GyrosCope".
---
Copyright 2005, Robert M. West, All Rights Reserved.

No, really! (Would I make this up?)

:EG:

...Bob

Bob West

[Andilinks]

Ancient Geeks did this:

http://www.giant.net.au/users/rupert/kythera/kythera.htm

http://www.math.sunysb.edu/~tony/whatsnew/column/antikytheraI-0400/kyth5.html

Lubricated with lamb fat from the Gyroscope shop.

[DogAndPony]

Ancient Geeks did this...Yes, the Ancient Geeks were very smart. But did they have white tape on their glasses? Or did they have glasses?

...Bob

Bob West

[VicCa.]

Um, what just happened? :umm: Yeah, I was wondering that too, which is why I "reverse trolled" Ms.Links' troll. It seemed very sleazy of her to pick such a sad anniversary for such a predatory troll.

If I post here now will Chipmunk delete all his posts? As AL desired, the post was cleaned. As I predicted, it looks like it's banished Chipmunk again.

Chipmunk's site had a nice commemorative piece, with some personal stories about an aunt survivor (not of Auschwitz, one of the other camps). It must have been a one day special, it's not there now.

[VicCa.]

Dave, how would you deploy the anti spam bass? :P

How about an anti spammer, self propelled, AI version of your anal probe? :P

Why is pork called "white" meat, when it's pink? :P

Will I be stalked by the troll now that one of its preferred targets is gone? :(

[Andilinks]

...a predatory troll. Normally I don't make fun of the mentally ill, but this is just too amusing to ignore.

Andi